Hungry Jack

It's been a little while since I've made any blog entries, so I thought I might address an issue which most people who know me already know, but which you, faithful reader, might not: I'm overweight. Not just a little overweight--according to the BMI index test that I took online two days ago, I am what is known as " morbidly obese. "
What this means is that my BMI index is at 45. A normal body mass index (or BMI for short) is around 15 to 30.
Now it is true, I did gain some weight after Olivia had the girls, but I seemed to help that "sympathy weight " along quite a bit.
Frankly, I am at a loss for to do.
I've tried several diets in the past. You name it: Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig (funny story that; their diet program at that time made my hair start to fall out), NutriSystem, Weight Watchers again, SlimFast, Metabolife, Bill Phillips' Body for Life program, and most recently Michael Thurmond's Six Week Body Makeover. So far, nothing has worked consistently.
By that, I mean that I am able to adhere to the particular diet plan/exercise plan for only a certain period of time. After that point, I lose interest, or I get frustrated, or I hit a plateau, or for some other reason, I simply stop following the program.
When I went to school at San Francisco State University, I did a one-man show called "Hungry Jack" (after the brand of biscuits) for my creative arts interdisciplinary program class. I did a monologue with diagrams (read: cartoons) to complement it.
I know that my parents worry about me, as does my wife, my sisters, and my best friend.
However, it was a comment of a family friend last Sunday that for some reason made it seem a bit more real, as this individual is usually very quick with a joke and a grin, something he is known for.
He remarked upon my weight in a joking manner, but as my wife and I were leaving his house, I asked him how his diabetes was doing and he told me that he was " sinning but enjoying it," and I had said something to the effect of moderation.
He got a little quiet and seemed to mumble the word "likewise."
This threw me.
Perhaps he meant nothing by it; perhaps it was simply that he couldn't think of what to say, or that he thought it was ironic that someone who is obviously overweight was telling someone else how to manage their diet.
That is possible, but it may also be equally possible that he might have been voicing a concern, and for him to actually say something to me, however roundabout it might have been, was significant.
I still don't know how I'm going to lose the weight, but I know now that I cannot afford to keep dicking around the way I have been.
I have been investigated the laproscopic band, the kind of weight-loss surgery that is reversible, which I find reassuring, and it's slow and steady weight loss, which is good - the last thing I want is to need cosmetic surgery to remove excess skin from my body after losing weight quickly (try going to sleep with that image bouncing around in your head!).
It is similar to what Al Roker had done, except instead of having my intestines rearranged, a small band would be fastened around my stomach and would shrink my stomach down to about the size of a tennis ball, thus limiting the amount of food that I can actually eat and giving me that full sensation much sooner than normal.
If anyone out there has had a lap band installed, or has simply had experience with weight-loss, please feel free to drop me line or leave a comment in the comments section.
Any feedback I can get on this will be greatly appreciated.
I know it's a cliche, but I'd like to see my little girls grow up, although I'm not looking forward to paying for two weddings.
Next time, I promise: funny stuff.
Really.

Take care,
~Rob